Little Progeny
by WriterPON3
Summary: Rick finds a baby in a basket one autumn night.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: I love Rick and Morty. Despite his flaws Rick (At least our Rick) is a good grandpa. And you know i love HP xovers so...dadadada! The first concieved Hp/Rick and Morty xover! **

**Question: How would Hogwarts survive a genius Harry raised by his Grandpa Rick? **

**Little Progeny**

Rick Sanchez walked through a vomit green portal with miscellaneous items in both hands.

"Boy that int(BUURP)tergalactic flea markets a weird place. But i(BUURP)ts the only place I can get crystallized plutonium for my Portal Gun.

Rick took his flask out of his lab coat and drank from it. "Oh (burrp) yeah, straight to the brain!"

DING DONG!

"Who the hell would be ringing my doorbell this time of night? I swear if its a girl or boy scout selling magazines I'm gonna..." Rick grumbled something about his portal gun and various alternate universes.

"Oh great this is even (buurp) better." Rick said sarcastically. "You little A-Holes!" He shouted. "I swear kids (burp) today have too much time on their hands..."

He heard giggling as he closed the door. He opened again. "Huh?" He looked down and there was a baby in a basket. "Oh (buurp) great. Well come on, I may be a scientist but I'm not heartless. Let's get you ins(burp)ide."

The black haired baby giggled.

"Huh? Curious. There's a note." Rick unfolded the note as he set the baby's basket on the couch.

Father,

This freak is Lily's baby. She went and got herself blown up by that Voldewhateverhisnameis she told us about while she was at that freak school.

Rick frowned. His Petunia took the whole pop psychology middle child scenario to a whole new level when it came to Lily. Out of his three daughters she was the least successful. She became a simple housewife while his eldest daughter Bethany became a successful vetrinarian with her own practice. His Lily though, was extra special. Inheriting his brains and her mothers wit and cheek made her quite the interesting kid. That and the whole magic thing.

"Oh so your my gran(burrp)dson too huh?" He asked the baby. He had four grandchildren now. The oldest, Summer, was female. He had three grandsons now. Morty the oldest boy, Dudley who he had met once and was unimpressed by, and now this little guy.

His name is Harry James Potter. Named after that freak she married.

Not caring to read the rest he tossed the letter away.

"Hey there little man. I'm your grand(buurp)pa Rick."

Harry giggled as Rick held him in both hands.

"Oh you like the way I talk (buurp) huh? I think you and I are gonna get along just fine."

He made a mental note to build his little grandson a special crib.

**The End**

**And so the seeds are planted! Hopefully more Hp/R&amp;M xovers will come!"**

**I have no idea how Ricks Portal Gun works. I'm assuming its a highly illegal element though. I recommend Rick and Morty to everyone who likes animated sitcoms, comedy and scifi. **

**I may just do one shots on this.**


	2. Chapter 2: Confrontation

Confrontation

Rick confronts Albus and Minerva about leaving his youngest grandson with Petunia.

ZAP The two magicals where very familiar with the vomit colored portal that appeared.

"Just perfect." Minerva said with two fingers on her nose bridge.

"You A-Holes (buurp) have a lot of explaining to do." Rick said angrily as he came through the portal.

"Mr. Sanchez please, I know your daughter's passing has upset you but-"

"I'm not talk(burp)ing about Lily's death, I've grieved, held a muggle service for her and moved on. My beef with (buurp) you turdballs is that you put my grandson with PETUNIA."

"How do you-?"

"Know? Because one night last (buurp) month I hear my doorbell ring after coming home from the inter(buurp)galactic flea market and what do I find? My youngest grandson on my doorstep. And a note from PETUNIA! You A-holes KNOW she hated Lily! Hell I would have preffered him raised by Beth and Jerry than Petunia and V-Bag." Rick used his little nickname for Vernon. A combination of Vernon and Douchebag.

"The Bloodwards will protect-"

"You know damn well that tllhat kind of blood magic only works if the (buurp) home owners actually care about who the wards are protecting. I have no doubt that had Harry been "Raised" by Petunia and (burp) V-Bag, he'd probably be in a cupboard or some kind of bullshit."

"Where is little Harry now?" Albus asked.

"Beth's watching him for me while I pick my bone with you two." Rick told the old man. "He's having a blast petting baby ponies."

"To be clear, in our own universe with Bethany and not in a universe full of pastel colored pony people right?" Mcgonagall demanded.

"Of course. I'm not exposing him to alternate universes till he's at least 5." Rick said with a raised hand. Just letting you know he's safe with family that will actually love and care for him. Especially since he's the only one of my grandkids who inherited my genius."

"Pardon?" Albus raised an eyebrow.

"I (burp) performed a brain scan on every one of my grandkids, Harry's cousins, (buurp) and none of them had the particular brainwave pattern that gives Ricks our genius. My Lily was booksmart, but she wasn't Ricksmart. Harry though, is. It skips a generation you see." He took a swing from his flask. Buurp. "My grandpa had it, I had it, Now Harry's my legacy. I (burp)'m the only one qualified to raise this kid in the world. So I'm say(buuurp)ing this only once. Try anything, and you'll regret it."

And with that Rick shot open another vomit green portal and walked through it. Then his head came back through.

"And don't even think about getting the Ministry of Magic involved. Some hi(burp)gh up shitheads owe me a few favors. Just a little friendly advice. See you assholes in ten years."

And with that Rick Sanchez left a very shocked Albus Dumbledore and Minerva Mcgonagall.

"Call a staff meeting. Let them know what is to come." Dumbledore groaned as he rubbed the bridge of his crooked nose.

**End of Confrontation**

**I am enjoying this! I like Ricks character! **

**Luna Eclipsed part 2 will be up soon. **


End file.
